Moms are, hands down, some of the world’s greatest multitaskers. When they’re not taking care of their kids, they’re preparing baon or washing the plates from last night’s dinner. If they have children who are in school, they spend time catching them up to speed on grammar or fractions. And if they’re working for a company, well, that means they have assignments and deadlines, too.
Managing all these tasks simultaneously hardly seems realistic, but somehow, they’re pulling it off. We asked a few moms how they’re keeping it together; here are some of their tips:
Take it one day at a time.
If you’re a new mom, it might take a while for the idea of motherhood to actually sink in. “The first step was to accept the reality that my life as a mom was going to be VERY different from before and that I would have way less time for myself,” says Danielle, 32 (D. Mendoza, interview via WhatsApp, April 7, 2020). “Sometimes I have to compartmentalize my brain from work mode to mom/wife/household manager mode, but those often blend from time to time, and that's okay” (D. Mendoza, interview via WhatsApp, April 7, 2020).
Encourage your kids to be independent.
For Shiloah, 39, the more things her young kids can do by themselves, the less she has to do for them. “They choose and put on their own clothes, decide what work or play they want to do, and divide chores between themselves (not always happily, but it gets done),” she says (S. Ma, interview via Messenger, April 7, 2020). “It’s not always the neatest or the fastest way, but it helps them feel capable. This way, I can focus on the things they actually can’t do and need me for, like cleaning the house, printing their schoolwork for the day, or working to earn money—or doing things I enjoy, so I’m not ‘cranky mom’” (S. Ma, interview via Messenger, April 7, 2020).
Learn to ask help from others.
It takes a village to raise a child, so don’t feel bad about reaching out to the people you trust for support. In fact, Danielle says that she often enlists the help of her own “village,” especially that of her husband and those in her household. Aside from delegating tasks, Danielle also cites open communication with her husband as one of the reasons she’s able to manage everything. “We’re always doing things as a team. I'm also really lucky to have a very supportive and understanding partner” (D. Mendoza, interview via WhatsApp, April 7, 2020).
Self-care is different for everyone. Some moms like to watch their favorite show once the kids are in bed, while others consider their evening skincare routine an indulgence. Find the brand of self-care that works for you, and make time for it. Your happiness and well-being matters, too!
At the end of the day, juggling multiple roles is a learning process. Every now and then, you might experience a few difficult moments, but that is part of what makes motherhood beautiful. It’s not perfect—in fact, most of the time, it’s a crazy messy affair—but it’s always fulfilling, and it’s always worth it.
Disclaimer: The views expressed by the moms interviewed in this article do not necessarily represent the opinions of the brand.